Teen Sex Today by Professor George

Because I have published many professional articles and books on gender and sexual identity problems in children and teenagers, I often receive emails and letters from mothers who are concerned about their sons.  My answer is essentially the same each time.  I’ve edited some recent email messages I received and sent to a mother about her son, changing her name to “Jane Doe” and other identifying information to keep her identity confidential.  You may want to “listen in” as I answer this concerned mother’s questions:

From: “Jane Doe” (name and location changed to protect identity)
To: info@professorrekers.com
Sent: Tuesday, September 16, 2008 8:00:34 AM
Subject: Question on therapy

Hello Professor Rekers,

I want to know if your book that I found on www.amazon.com, Handbook of Child and Adolescent Sexual Problems will provide information on how to implement the treatment you speak of for gender identity disorder.  Also are there doctors who studied under you in private practice in the Oklahoma City area that you know and trust?

Sincerely,
“Jane Doe” (name withheld to protect identity)

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From: Dr. George Rekers
Subject: Re: Question on therapy
To: “Jane Doe” (name withheld to protect identity)
Date: Wednesday, September 17, 2008, 10:34 AM
Dear “Jane,”

Yes, there are two chapters that I wrote in my Handbook of Child and Adolescent Sexual Problems (Lexington Books of Simon & Schuster), which specifically provide information for other clinical child psychologists or other child mental health professionals to follow, for diagnosis of gender identity disorder and then for specific steps to take for therapeutic interventions.  That was the purpose of those two chapters.  And those chapters cite the professional journal articles that contain even more detail, but a clinical child psychologist trained in family interventions and child behavior therapy could use just those two chapters to develop an individualized assessment and treatment plan (if necessary) for your son.

Unfortunately, I do not know of any therapists in the Oklahoma City area.

You may also want to check my website at http://www.ProfessorGeorge.com for more information.

Regards,
George A. Rekers, Ph.D.
Distinguished Professor of Neuropsychiatry and Behavioral Science Emeritus
University of South Carolina School of Medicine
http://www.ProfessorGeorge.com

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From: “Jane Doe” (name withheld to protect identity)
To: Dr. George Rekers
Sent: Monday, September 22, 2008 1:08:03 PM
Subject: Please answer one Question on therapy as soon you can.

Hi again Dr. George Rekers,

I have ordered both the Handbook of Child and Adolescent Sexual Problems and your other book Shaping Your Child’s Sexual Identity from www.amazon.com. I have not received either book yet.

I had my son mention the removing of his penis two times this weekend and it is scaring me to death. How do I respond? If you could help me with just that answer it would help me get thru until I receive the books.

He said it a week ago and I was panicked, I told him that he should never say that and that he could bleed to death if he cut his penis off. I must say I reacted very afraid. What am I suppose to say and how should I say it, calmly, sternly, light heartedly?

I don’t want him to do anything stupid while I am working on getting this turned around. I have removed all the pink towels, I have set up some very successful male playmates and a couple not so great ones. My husband has spent lots of good quality one on one time with him, taking him to the creek to catch crayfish, ice skating, visit to the fire station all this weekend.

In public, he tries to go the bathroom with me instead of going to the mens’ room with my husband, and I told him no he had to go with the boys,  He finally had to go bad enough that he went with his Dad and his 4 yr old friend from Pre-Kindergarten.

I have stopped bathing him with his little 2 yr old sister and I have avoided dressing and getting ready in front of him as much as possible.

The psychologist I visited with on Thursday agreed that the significant emotional event that triggered this was the two older boys in preschool that would include and then reject him. It definitely still bothers him and he has made the statement that boys are “mean” and girls are “nice” so he wants to be a girl.

Any help appreciated,
“Jane”

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From: Dr. George Rekers
Subject: Re: Please answer one Question on therapy as soon you can.
To: “Jane Doe” (name withheld to protect identity)
Date: Wednesday, September 24, 2008, 9:53 PM
Dear “Jane,”

As much as I would otherwise wish to advise you, because I am licensed as a clinical psychologist only in South Carolina and not in Oklahoma, it would not be legal for me to offer any specific psychotherapeutic advice to you specifically regarding your child. Because of the licensing laws, I am only allowed to offer general educational information to you and suggest that you seek licensed professional assistance in your state for your son.

I recommend that you obtain advice from a licensed mental health professional there in Oklahoma, because your son’s behavior you described warrants a competent evaluation and diagnostic assessment to determine whether he is in need of psychological treatment.

Regards,
George A. Rekers, Ph.D.
Distinguished Professor of Neuropsychiatry and Behavioral Science Emeritus
University of South Carolina School of Medicine
http://www.ProfessorGeorge.com

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From: “Jane Doe” (name withheld to protect identity)
To: Dr. George Rekers
Sent: Thursday, September 25, 2008 10:28:58 AM
Subject: Re: Please answer one Question on therapy as soon you can.

Dr. George Rekers,

Ok. Thank you. I must say that I have recently received and read your book, Shaping Your Child’s Sexual Identity and it has some excellent steps to take. I think we are on the right track and I see that I have enabled some of this feminine behavior in my son, and I will now be confident that treating these statements and behavior as general undesired behavior is the right thing to do instead of taking a unisex attitude towards them.

Then I received your Handbook of Child and Adolescent Sexual Problems yesterday and I will be getting some time this evening to read those two chapters on gender identity problems. My husband has stepped up the one-on-one time with our son and is doing those boy things with him that he loves to do.

We are going to get him turned around. We have a good firm action plan and now we are both armed with your incredible information that confirms we are now on the right track.

Thanks again!

Wish you were located in Oklahoma where we live. Your work has incredible impact from what I can see already and I can see that God has worked thru you.

God Bless,
Jane

Hi Reader,
It’s me again—Professor George.  I’d be interested in your reaction to my email interchange with this mother concerned about her son’s sexual identity.  E-mail your comments or questions to:
teensextoday@ProfessorGeorge.com or just write to me on my blog. If we
post what you write, we will keep it anonymous. Count on me to be
logical, ethical, and scientific in my answers.

–Professor George
© Copyright, 2008, Professor George LLC
George A. Rekers, Ph.D., FAACP,
Distinguished Professor of Neuropsychiatry and Behavioral Science
Emeritus
University of South Carolina School of Medicine
www.ProfessorGeorge.com